Feeling Stuck

Every once in a while, we all have periods where we feel “stuck”.

We’ve all felt like we’re drowning in mud.

we feel Confused,

overwhelmed,

anxious,

even afraid…

Being stuck is a time when not much happens.

Anxiety comes when we think it should be otherwise.

We start to force ourselves to work, to come up with ideas and to make things happen.

When we don’t get anywhere, we call it being stuck.

What if — just what if being stuck is not the problem, but our perception of it?

What if the label “being Stuck” is just a natural part of life?

What if these periods are no different than the seasons?

There’s sun. There’s snow, Rain..

There’s light, and there’s darkness.

Over to the big question!!!!!

Why do we get Stuck?

Lets see,

we get stuck when we think we should be something we’re not.

When we think life should be different than it is.

Being stuck is like quicksand.

The more you try to get out, the deeper you sink.

We think if I could just control life, all would be well.

Hmmm…

It never is that easy is it?!?!

Here are a few tips that could help…

1. Give in

Surrendering or giving up are not words I use often, I seldom use them,

but you know what they say,

you have to choose your battles wisely.

This is a lose the battle to win the war kinda archetype.

You see,

When we try to work and we do not make any real progress,

We end up feeling worse,

sinking deeper — QuickSand!!!

What I have realized, is that most times, the resistance to your suffering is what makes you suffer.

Sometimes all we need is time,

time to be able to take a step back and see what we are doing,

and why we are doing it,

and we need space to do this.

Sometimes, life is so busy,

we don’t give ourselves that space, and this is exactly what we need.

A short story

Bill gate has this ritual he started in the 1980’s,

he calls it a “Think week”.

What happens here is, he takes a week off, twice a year,

goes somewhere, alone,

no friends, family, phone, email, nothing, nada,

just him and his books..

What emotion or feeling spun the idea for his Think Week?

Dare i say, he was feeling what we all feel sometimes..

was he feeling stuck?

I suggest this;

Let yourself emotionally fall into it and let everything that you feel be there,

just accept it for the moment.

Hold your hand through it,

have empathy with yourself as you would a dear friend.

This is my school of thought.

If you stay completely in the moment, there is no being stuck,

but that doesn’t mean that the feelings go away.

You might still feel the anxiety, but it wouldn’t have a death grip on you anymore..

The funny thing is, when you accept being stuck,

you’re not stuck anymore, because being stuck was all in your head to begin with.

2. Chop Life

There’s always something you feel drawn to do during this period.

You’re not completely stuck, not in every area of your life.

Given this Covid-19 situation there’s not much to do

but,

right now, I’m reading more books, writing this article..

If you have kids play with them,

a spouse, you might as well.. you know…

Netflix is your friend..

Reconnect with friends.

Explore on youtube.

Learn about Bitcoin with Patricia..

You just have to get yourself to do something..

It’s easy to feel guilty during this period because you feel like you’re not doing enough.

But no,

thats a trap right there.

Do the work you need to do.

But then, let yourself have fun.

At this time doing less is actually doing more.

3. Trust your process.

Yes you have made some bad decisions,

maybe a truck load.

Do not forget you have equally made some amazing decisions.

You are exactly where you need to be at this time.

Sometimes there is no pushing needed.

Life lives itself through us, because we are life.

We are not separate from anything or anyone.

You are this planet. You are the stars. I am you.

Like Rumi said,

I sometimes wonder why we think we are not supported in life.

We come into this world through a womb, where we’re supported.

The trees in the forest are supported. Yet we believe we’re the exception.

Here’s what the bible has to say about this:

Matthew 6:26 “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”

Hmmm…

I don’t think we are an exception,

we just think that life should look different than it is.

But the fact that life isn’t what you think it is shows that we’re very wrong.

I’ve learned that life isn’t all about accomplishing things.

Sometimes it’s about resting and letting things be.

You do the best you can with what you have.

Be kind to yourself.

Let yourself be completely stuck.

Once you let it be what it is,

things change because your perception changes.

REVERSALS:

STUCK vs LAZY

There is a clear distinction between being “LAZY” and being “STUCK”.

Don’t you play yourself.

STUCK vs TIME

It is easy to get carried away giving in or surrendering to being “Stuck”.

Take your time,

but do not take too much time,

before this becomes your new reality.

Example;

If your car was stuck in mud,

You should take your time to look around(give in),

Observe your environment, call a friend, make a joke about it (chop life).

Most times the solution comes to you during these times.

If it doesn’t,

devise a plan and fix it,

not shrugging your shoulders and spending over 6 hours in your car all in the notion of giving in to being stuck.

Like I said it’s always been about Perspective.